Minding the Busy-ness

I woke up with a tight upper back and feeling extremely tired. Why am I dragging so hard this morning I thought to myself. Then while I was driving my son to school it came to me. I heard: "Look at the past week" and so I did and it was truly shocking. In the past 9 days, this is everything that has happened:

• Puppy had surgery to get fixed

• 5 client sessions

• Full days of work

• My birthday

• My daughter's birthday

• FIVE kid birthday parties between my two kids (including my daughters which I had to coordinate obviously)

• A surprise visit from my dad from Ontario for my birthday

• Renovations began on our basement

• Plus the usual gymnastics and baseball drop offs/pick ups

• Solo parenting for the last few days

Why don't we give ourselves enough credit for how thin we get stretched? Why does it feel like that meme with the dog drinking coffee in the burning house saying "This is fine. Everything's fine."

We are conditioned to suck it up. To grin and bear it. To push through. But I have to tell you it's really fucking hard. Where is the compassion for ourselves? Where is the permission to rest?

Also, it feels bizarre to me that we are inundated with information about spy balloons being shot down, alien contact, poisonous materials being burned and wrecking our environment but yet still made to go to work like nothing is going on and care about company profits.

This duality between the old system and new system is such a shock to the system. It literally feels like we are between timelines and programming. I know that these things are coming to light for a reason but the constant strain on our mental health is actually really scary. In a love and light sort of way everything will all work out for the highest good. But that doesn't negate the fact that these shifts and changes are unprecedented. We are all silos in our suffering when we should be held together as a collective to know that we are not alone. We deserve to take a break and look at the bigger picture to see how intense everything is at the moment.

Why am I so tired? Why is my skin breaking out in rashes and/or acne? Why is my digestion all weird? Why are my neck and back going out? All things that have happened to me but also to my clients. I'm here to tell you that you are not alone. In my vulnerability I see the humanness in you. As human beings we are meant to be surrounded by our people and feel that sense of community and support. Our current societal structure pushes us to the opposite. We NEED each other and we need to know that we are not alone. It's okay. Everything will be okay. But it's also alright if in this moment right now you are not okay. Pushing through isn't always the answer. Sometimes some self-compassion and a good cry is the best medicine. To be able to feel the emotions and let them pass through instead of gaslighting yourself into thinking that everything is okay. Today I am not okay. I am feeling a lot and am hurting. In this moment, how can I show up for myself? What do I need to do to feel more balanced within myself? Allowing yourself to go through the emotion instead of pushing through or repressing is the key. Not dwelling within the space, but honestly letting everything come to the surface so that it can be transmuted. Through crying, dancing, calling a friend to chat, meditating, taking a nap, whatever feels best for you in this moment. Do that. Do the thing even if it's not "productive".

We are moving out of the old programs of the previous generations. We are being asked to step into a new way of being and feeling. And it's a lot. There is a lot going on in the micro along with the macro. Give yourself grace. Give yourself rest. And if you are feeling called, book a session with me and I would be honoured to hold space for you as you move through. You don't have to do it alone. <3